Interracial Relationships

Recently, one of my close female friends was approached by a fellow male student who bluntly inquired about her involvement in an interracial relationship. I do not want to directly quote, because I was not involved in the situation, though I do want to give you an idea of how it came about. My friend, who is white, was at social event, and she had just talked with the other student for the first time, which is somewhat comical seeing how small Rhodes is. As he offered to make her a drink, he said something along the lines of, ‘So I hear you like black guys.’

Upon hearing this, it initially startled me that someone would be so comfortable in posing such a question. Then I realized how it was personally affecting me, even though I was not involved, because I became angry. But why was I angry? I have never been in an interracial relationship. Was I upset because I felt the statement was racially charged? Possibly, because knowing the male student was also white, it would be likely that I could easily make that assumption.

Having been raised in the Deep South, I have definitely been surrounded by this issue before, and I am aware of a lot of the connotations that come with an interracial relationship, both good and bad. I’ve had the grandparents who still hold their values close with the antebellum period. I also admit to having a ‘mammy’ like figure in my life, who once told me with all the love in the world, ‘Blue birds mate with blue birds, and red birds mate with red birds.’ On the other hand, I am a product of the millennium. The social norms for my generation are completely different, and appropriately, my personal views are too.

Before writing this blog, I decided to do a little research on interracial relationships. I found a lot of information on interracial relationships between not just black and white individuals, but also mixed couples involving Middle Eastern, Asian, and Hispanic descent. However, most of the information was directed towards mixed race relationships involving defined African Americans and Caucasians. As expected, I found interracial relationships were on the rise. According to a study done in 2010 by Pew Research Center, one out of every seven marriages in the U.S. is interracial. Apparently, it is becoming more commonplace and socially acceptable to date outside your own race. The same study did also note that according to their findings, education and location were key variables. [You can find an article summarizing the study here.]

In class we’ve touched on educational disparity between races, both in the past and currently, and I find this variable quite intriguing. From a personal standing, it makes sense that education plays such a big role in interracial relationships. Relationships typically evolve from peer interaction. Thus if a school is predominately one race, it would be understandable that the peer group would be limited in interracial relationships. Similarly, if a school is very racially diverse, the peer group would offer more opportunity for interracial relationships.

In connecting my initial observation to this latter one, the research makes me take Rhodes into consideration. After reading some other blog posts that touch on racial diversity at our school, especially this one, I wondered how much of a role does Rhodes’ diversity play in interracial relationships here. My previously mentioned friend was indeed in a relationship with another black student for quite some time. But, I cannot say that I know of too many other similar relationships on campus. Now this might simply be a fault of my own for not knowing enough of the student body, but it is just an observation.

Still, if my observation is somewhat accurate, what does that say about our school? If I was to apply the research to our campus, would it simply suggest that our lack of diversity contributes to the lack of interracial relationships? Or are there other factors that must be taken into consideration with looking at Rhodes in this perspective? I considered our location, not just the South in general, but Memphis, a city known for its high population of African Americans. To me, it then just seems kind of ironic that Rhodes would have diversity issues.

Lastly, (and I’m sorry this is so long) if the male individual I mentioned initially had any racially charged initiative in his inquiry which is how he came off, what does that mean? What does that say about relationships socially? I know I would not be comfortable in asking people such seemingly personal questions as he did, but I usually shy away from confrontation. Even more so, is it inappropriate to ask a question that clearly is racially driven? Playing devils advocate, if he is just an extremely curious person and is comfortable with approaching people so frankly, should his question be taken more on a pragmatic level? That is, should we be more readily open to discuss topics involving race if we are to eliminate the tension that can accompany those topics?

Thoughts would be much appreciated!